The Beauty of Secrets

What makes us different from our peers? Is it the house that we live in or the car we drive? What defines us? Is it just the superficial beauty,which we have no hand in? Or is it something else? Something deeply ingrained in us.. Something that is so deeply rooted in us, that defines what we do, even before we realize it....


..That is our character.


An intriguing facet of human character is affinity for Secrecy. Be it out of fear, out of joy, or may be malicious intent... we are adept at creating an air of mystery. However, the temptation break the cycle of secrecy is often inexplicably overwhelming not only for those who are sworn to secrecy, but often they perpetrator themselves. Yes, I have had many a treasured secrets, either being sworn to it or creating it! And I admit I have spilled many a beans. Weather changes, time passes, and oath of life of some bygone time is merrily forgotten at the spur of a moment! And thus some yesteryear secrets of someone, becomes a tea-table gossip of everyone! 


I return home from college by bus. There’s a train route, but I prefer the buses for various reasons. First, I am always sure to get a comfortable seat --for I board from the Depot. Secondly, the route is scarcely crowded unlike the trains, which are bursting at the rivets at the peak evening hour crowd-bursts.
Although some time is wasted as the bus snakes through the congested city-road, but breathing the cold

evening air from the window seat of a speeding bus is an intoxicating feeling in it’s own right. Time flies by as I hum my way through the seven stops to the place I call my ‘sweet home’. Nobody hears my songs over the dean and bustle of the droning bus engine and cacophony of the passengers. 
It was like any other day of my ‘bus'-y schedule except that a pretty lady chose to sit next to me right from the depot. It is not that the bus was something ‘Men Only’ or, that a lady never sat beside me, No! It was special because the girl was very pretty-- I’d rather say beautiful, and I have never seen a pretty girl with such poise, without even a hint of snobbish air! She was quite at ease sitting beside a total stranger who was visibly almost gawking at her! She was wearing a pink salwar and her earthly skin tone matched it well. She was in her twenties. As if drugged by the sweet fragrance that hung about her, I kept staring at her, albeit bordering on leeching! She looked at me through the corner of her eyes yet I couldn't take my eyes off her! I was about to collect myself, before somebody labeled me a standard leech, divine extraordinary happened, guess what? She smiled back at me! 
“Oh she smiled at me!” It was love at first sight for me… I felt some butterflies in my stomach, yet a pain scratched across my mind-- my love would last for only Seven stoppages of the bus!
She was with her friend who was standing near the seat behind us. She offered her friend to sit in her place. I mumbled silent “No’s” under my breadth!
“No! I am fine Anushka.” Her friend said and I thanked God, again!
So her name was Anushka. I wanted to tell her that I never heard such a beautiful name in my life, but the man in front of me was reading a newspaper, and there was a picture of Anushka Shankar on that. The news was “Anushka expecting a baby.” I controlled myself!
Anushka turned back and eyed the seat behind us. A young commuter was sitting on it, probably returning from his college or office.
“Can you please stand up? Let my friend have a seat.” She asked him.
“But these are not ladies seats.” The man protested. All men are not impressed by beauty, I sighed!
“You should. She is not well today.”, Anushka was adamant.
“No! Anushka, I am fine here.” The friend protested.
“Actually I’m also not well today.” The man desperately clung to his seat.
“Frankly speaking Mister” She kept her voice low. “She is having her periods.”
The man jumped up from his seat. The friend of Anushka was vividly embarrassed. Her cheek turned red. I kept looking outside the window as if I hadn't heard a thing! Such a feisty girl! Secrets are meant to be told!




The Second Stoppage came………..




Her phone rang. I kept my ears open as I was very much interested in obtaining her mobile number.
“Hello!” She said.
My God! What a phone! That phone could be used for an walkie-talkie easily! What a voice-clarity! I was listening to what the caller was talking clearly. My eagerness could also have affected my senses with extra clarity on the face of such an opportune-crisis!
“You got my letter?” The caller enquired-- a male voice.
“Letter! Who’s speaking?”

“Abhishek.”
“Oh! Hi! Yeah! I got it.” Anushka replied!
“So! What’s your answer?”
“I’ll think about it. Ok?”
“Why are you not saying just ‘yes’ Anu!” The caller pleaded, he could as well be on his knees-- I guessed from the tone of his desperation!
“Look Abhishek. I’ll call you tomorrow. Ok? Now Bye!” Anushka said firmly.
“Anu… Please keep the letter a secret. Please.”
“Ok!”


I was thinking who that could be. His lover or just his friend wanting to be a lover. Who?




The third stoppage came…..




Anushka turned to her friend.
“June. Your brother called.”
“Abhi?? Called you? Why??” She was surprised.
“He has fallen in love with me.”
“Abhi??? Are you serious???”
“Yes! I got a letter too” Anushka chuckled.
She handed a folded piece of paper over to June.
“But he is younger to us.” June still could not believe her ears.
“Just read it.”


Some silent moments passed. It was June who talked first.
“I just can’t believe it.”
Anushka was about to tell her something but her mobile rang. I straightened up, ears straining!
“Hello!”
“Hi Anu!” This time it was a female voice. I sighed in relief.
“Hi Manjusree! What happened?”

“Hey! What were you two doing in garden today?”
I held my breath again.
“Who?” Anushka smiled.
“Rahul and you.”
“Oh my god! You saw us? “ She laughed.
“Please! Please! Please! Tell me! Tell me! “ She was ecstatic.
“Ok ! But he told me to keep it secret. Actually he proposed me.”
I sighed again. This time it was in agony. My luck had always betrayed me whenever I was near my goals. It was happening again! But I was determined to get hold of her number. She might choose me as a better candidate. There is always hope, the glass is always half full!


“He proposed to you? But you know? ... June had already proposed to him.” Manjushree said.
“What? “ Anushka lowered her tone.
“Yes! June herself told me to keep it a secret. Please do not tell anyone.”
“No! No! I wouldn’t.” How many more secrets are to be plundered, I wondered, that too in seven stops!




The fourth stoppage came ….




I was almost near end of my journey. So I thought this would be the ideal time to ask her for her mobile number. Again I thought that asking her just where she lived or where her college was might be a better idea. I was planning to start the conversation but just then she turned to her friend and asked.
“You proposed to Rahul?”
“What!! Who told that to you? “ June was genuinely surprised!
“Manjushree. Did you propose or not ?” Anushka was desperate.
“No! I mean…. Yes! ... Actually Rahul proposed to me.”
“Oh!! Rahul had also proposed to me today!”
“What? “ She almost shouted in shock. “Are you joking? When? Where? “
“In our college garden. He held me against the wall and asked for a kiss.”
“Wha.. What did you say ?” She was visibly flustered!
“I rejected. Then he proposed to me again, and I said… “
“You said what?? “ She shouted again. All the passengers of the bus were looking at these two girls.
“I said “You are not my type””.


Everything was silent for some moments. I was happier than before. But was not sure of what her type actually was.
“What is your type Anushka?” I was startled as June asked Anushka the question I was thinking right now! As if she had seen through my minds startled me from my dreamy state of contemplations!
“My type? I love intellectuals. I love writers, artists, poets. I dream of having a lover who would write sweet stories on me and I would kiss him after reading that.” Anushka said.
My chances had increased.
“I can write whatever you want. I can make you the queen of my fairy-tales. I can make you Alice in my wonderland. I can make you the Tomb Raider, who would finish off a thousand bad-guys to secure the world. I can erase this world and draw it again like you want. Just ask me to do it, Anushka! “ I said silently to myself... as if rehearsing before actually saying it.


“Anu!” June said. “I think I should talk to Rahul.”
“Now?” Anushka exclaimed.
“Yes. I’ll go home later. First I have to meet him.”
“So where are you going now?”
“I’ll go to Rahul’s home now. Please don’t tell this to anyone. I’ll be a little late reaching home. If mom calls you, just say that I’m not with you. Ok?”
“Ok!”




The fifth stoppage came….




June had alighted from the bus. Now it was only Anushka and me. I thought this was the ideal time to ask her for a date! Yet I could not make up my mind! They say you have to have some spine if you are dealing in things like this, you have to speak up! Unless you do, how will the lady know that you are interested at all! The smiling you might as well be a ‘just another’ polite good-guy, in the city of inherently sprawling bad-guys! I think that’s what ladies think! Don’t know if men really give them the creeps!


Anushka was busy with her phone again. This time she dialed a number.
“Hello?” A female voice was there.
“Hello Aunty! I am Anushka”
“Hi Anu! What happened? “
“Nothing aunty. I called you just to inform some things about June... which I feel aren’t quite right!”
“June? What happened to her? “ The lady said with a tensed voice.
“Actually aunty, I don’t think if she is doing it right.” I was staring at her. How a beautiful lady could be so dangerous! Moreover this lady really had the sting! She will be what the colloquial terminology believes to be a ‘terminal bitch’ ... the rude words be pardoned, they only come in good terms here!
“What did she do?” June’s mom said in a increasingly impatient voice.
“Please Aunty. Don’t misunderstand me. I just wanted to warn you. She is keeping bad company now-a-days. She is now at Rahul’s home. I thought it was my duty to look out for my dear friend! Please aunty, don’t tell her that I told you these things.”

I kept staring at her... Really ? I read about evil queens in fantasy stories but never believed their existence. 



The sixth stoppage came…...




I was thinking how I should start talking. I was dubious as well as tongue tied now... yet with all that had transpired she seemed more attractive! The perfect blend of prettiness, politeness, unpredictability and ‘a cute evilness’ ... a real woman! I was secretly longing for her all the more!
Her mobile rang again.
“Hello!”
“Where you are?”
“In the bus, mom! Returning.”
“Is June with you?”
“No mom! She went elsewhere.”
“You are there all by yourself?” Her mom’s voice was a little worried.
“Yeah mom !“ She paused for a moment. ”and a little afraid too.”
“Why? What happened?” the lady shouted.
“Somebody’s constantly watching me mom!” Anushka told in a nearly inaudible voice.
“Who? Where is he? Is he following you?”
“He is just beside me."


I jumped out of my seat and got off from the running bus. It was a little walk to my seventh stoppage.


My heart was still beating hard on my ribs...!


Anushka, has had her story... but she may not as well kiss me, as she promised-- after reading it!
-------------------- Edited by Bipul Islam. 14 Feb, 2011 ---------------------------

The Story called 'Thriller'

Again I have started writing... That too after thinking of never writing anything again…Truly speaking I thought I won’t be able to write anymore. But thanks to my loving wife Radhika, I made it. No word is enough to express my gratitude to her. But first I need to tell you who I am.

I am a part time writer in the daily newspaper, “New Day”. If you are a keen reader of newspaper stories, you must have seen my name. It’s not that I have already impressed you by my stories. Probably you too have laughed at one of my stories some days back, and like the editor of the newspaper you too have already named me a “A Backdated Writer”. Actually I write romantic stories; especially those where the groom kisses the bride or a lover meets her beloved at the end of the scene. I like writing these stories as I feel very safe while reading them. I love to think of the world as a place of love.

So recently I finished writing a story on Salil and Sunanda, who were the only child of their respective parents, and fell in love with each other. Since their parents were against their marriage they left home and spent two nights in the Jungle. But soon they realised that it was impossible for them to live on their own so they returned home, but there was nobody who would accept them. But since they had spent two nights together, everyone in their village took them as Husband and Wife. So they lived happily ever after. I was very happy after finishing the story. But soon my happiness was gone as I entered the Editor’s room.

“You call this a story?? “, he was furious.

“Why? Don’t you like it?” I sounded sceptical.

“What kind of a story writer you are? You call this romantic?”

“Is it not enough? But it already has two kisses.”

“Look mister.” He paused a bit. “You should really read some modern stories.”

“Modern stories ?!!” I shouted “You call them stories??” This time I was furious.

“Look man! Your story really has nothing to do with romance. I think…” He hesitated. ”I think you need to change your writing style...”

“Writing style?” I was puzzled.

“Actually don’t mind sir. Your romantic stories are not actually… selling! So you should try something else.”

“Something else?” I was puzzled even more.” Actually I don’t know anything else worth writing about.”

“No! No! I am not telling that.” He sounded a little kind. ”Why don’t you write something else… like a thriller… ”

“Thriller?”

“Yes! Thriller! Actually thriller types are selling like hot cakes. You should try one sir! Look sir .. You are a very talented writer but these days………. “. He continued but I was not listening. My mind was already searching for a thriller. 

What is a thriller? Something that makes you have goose bumps. My life is very simple. There are no bumps in it. So it is very hard for me to write a thriller. Famous writers always have a story or two based on their lives; they furnish it by some punch-lines and one-liners and what they get is a best-selling novel. But in my case it was not so easy. I am that kind of a person who actually overlooks incidents. If I am walking on a road and there is a man beating another man in front of me, I don’t want to join the fight or protect the victim. I always increase my speed. So thrillers, incidents, accidents, stories avoid me.

But I found one at last … ….

                                     

After dinner I lit a cigarette and sat down on the sofa. I was in deep thought when my wife joined me with a glass of wine in her hand.

“Are you tensed?” My wife asked as I was totally silent at the dinner table.

“No. Not that. I was thinking… “

“What’s the matter?” She took my hand in her own.

“Actually Rai” (I call her Rai affectionately; her name is Radhika as I had previously said.) “I need a thriller.”

“A thriller?”

“Yes. A thriller. These romantic stories are not selling right now.” I sounded quite similar to the editor.

Radhika looked puzzled. “So your story was rejected..”

“Sad but… yes.”

There was a long pause between us. I was searching for a thriller and she was looking at me. She was the first one to break the ice.

“You want a thriller?”

“Yes… Desperately.”

“What if I tell you one…?” She put down her wine glass on the table in front of her.

“You? Thriller ? Sure!!“  I was ecstatic.

“I am not a story-teller. I can only give you a plot.”

So she started the story and I leaned on her lap. It is always a pleasure to hear a story from a lady.

“Yamini’s husband was a serviceman. They were not a happy couple. But nobody saw them arguing over anything ever. So people assumed them to be a happy couple.” She paused and sipped at her wine. I pulled at her glass, put it on the table and said, “First, Tell me the story.”

“O.K.!” She smiled and continued. “Yamini was never happy with her life. She wanted it to be more fruitful. She was tired of her daily routine of cooking, arranging food and waiting for her husband to come home. She wanted to have a child but her husband thought otherwise. In one words, she was disgusted with her own life. But she never thought of committing suicide as Arup was present in her life.”

“Arup, a charming young man in his 30s, was a friend of Yamini’s husband. Whenever her husband was not at home, Arup came. He was like a breath of fresh air in her life. They loved each other. Arup presented her with a golden locket with ‘A’ carved on it whereas Yamini presented him with a gold pendant with ‘Y’ carved on it. “

“Nobody suspected anything and this continued for a year or two. Suddenly Yamini got pregnant. She became very afraid because her husband could kill them both if he knew of this incident. She told Arup that she was pregnant. Arup told her to abort the child but Yamini was not ready to do so. So they decided to kill Yamini’s husband in such a way so that nobody ever suspects anything.”

“One night Yamini and her husband were sitting on the sofa. Two wine glasses were in front of them. She sat on her lap and kissed him deeply. Her husband held her tightly and was about to kiss her when she said, “Let’s finish the drink first.” Her husband was busy finishing his drink when she broke her own glass and slit his throat with the broken glass from behind.”

“Police discovered the body after seven days when neighbours complained of foul smell. The body was totally disintegrated and a post mortem was unable to find the exact time of murder. Police also found that the victim’s wife Yamini had been sleeping with her boyfriend for the last seven days. They suspected her but she had a strong alibi that they couldn’t break.” She finished and took her wine glass into her hand.

“Is it really a thriller?” I was not sure.

“Yes. When you are reading a story but cannot figure out what will happen at the end that is called a thriller.”

“But I figured out. Actually it was easy to figure out.” I sounded confident.

“Oh. Is it? “She smiled. “Then you must be very intelligent.” She came to me, sat on my lap and kissed me deeply.

“But you must finish your drink first.” I pushed her aside and laughed. She was laughing too. Then I stood up, placed my hands in my pockets and said,

“I have something for you.”

She was looking at my hand while drinking the last drop of wine.

I pulled out a gold chain from my pocket with “R” carved on it. I held it before her eyes. She was looking at it. She was looking at the blood dripping from it.

“I have killed Ranjan.” I said in a cold voice. “It’s not his. It’s yours. ‘R’ as it is in Radhika. The other one, the ‘R’ of Ranjan, you are wearing at present.” I smiled. She was still holding her empty glass. I took it and placed a kiss on her forehead.

“Have a good sleep.”

I looked at the glass, it was totally empty. She had finished all the wine that had cyanide mixed with it.

I had got my own version of a ‘Thriller’.